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Mind Reading II

soroban

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2012
409

Mind Reading II

1. What was said.

2. What was thought by the listener.



1. Are you listening to me?

2. The one day I leave my umbrella at home ...


1. Bring me an order of canapes a la bayonnaise.
Then I'll have the anguilles au vert
followed by bisque d'ecrevisses.
After that, I'd like . . .

2. One number four.


1. If anyone knows why this man and this woman
should not be joined in the bond of holy matrimony,
let him speak now or forever hold his peace.

2. The line forms to the left.


1. Frank and I went to extraordinary lengths
to find this wedding gift for you.

2. Yes, I go to the same bank.


1. Sorry, dear. I know you were looking forward
to the ballet tonight, but a problem came up
at the office, then I had flat tire, and . . .

2. Coming to a theater near you.


1. Because though hast done this,
thou art cursed above all cattle
and above every beast of the field;
upon thy belly shalt thou go,
and dust thou eat
all the days of thy life.

2. Well, exc-u-u-se me!


1. Enjoying myself? Are you kidding?
This party is absolutely the pits.
I hear our hostess give these parties
because her husband is too dumb
to make his own business contacts.
I haven't met her yet, but I hear . . .

2. Should I tell him now?


1. My wife and I are, uh, separated.

2. Sure, you're here and she's not.