What Do You Do If You Were a Rock Star?

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Realize that I was living in a world that was "All strung out", and buy a pair of sissors.

What would you do if you were "All strung out"?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What would you do if you were "All strung out"?

Get knotted!

What do you do if you need to get knotted, but have run out of beer and/or friends who will buy you beer?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Drink Scotch! (neat!)

What do you do if you run out of Scotch??

 

[megashawn]

What do you do if you run out of Scotch??

Break out the everclear, can't beat 195 proof. You can even run a car off the stuff.

What do you do if you spill your everclear on an open flame?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by megashawn
What do you do if you spill your everclear on an open flame?

Put on your flame-retardant underwear and hope for the best. Also tip the bottle up so it stops spilling or you'll have to make another trip to the liquor store.

What do you do if your flame-retardant underwear catches on fire?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Hose 'em off.

What would you do if you couldn't find you way out of your own mind?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What would you do if you couldn't find you way out of your own mind?

Most people would probably opt for LSD, but I'd just take a nap.

What do you do if you need instructions on how to prepare a Pop-Tart?

 

[Matt]

Refer to the side of the box - there are actually instructions there.

What do you do if you are forced to go back to school in 1 and a half weeks?

 

[Pack]

Originally posted by Matt
What do you do if you are forced to go back to school in 1 and a half weeks?

I would ask my parents for some lunches money.

What do you do if you suddenly wake up one day and realize that all of your previous memory was just a dream?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Forgetaboutit!

What do you do if, when 'forgettingaboutit' you can do nothing but remember it?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if, when 'forgettingaboutit' you can do nothing but remember it?

Obviously you take forgettingaboutit lessons.

What do you do if you fail that class?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Remember that you forgot to pass.

What do you do, if a croco'dile, swims into your bedroom, while you are making Sweeeeat love to the next door neighbour's partener?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Ask another question!

What do you do if no one responds to your questions?

 

[nucleartear]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if no one responds to your questions?

If only a 10-years-old boy talks with me and I'm his psychologist, I would begin to suspect that maybe I am dead.

What do you do if you begin to suspect that maybe you are dead?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by nucleartear
What do you do if you begin to suspect that maybe you are dead?

Stay alert to how you smell. If
you are dead it will become ap-
parent.

What do you do if you begin to
suspect you aren't dead but smell
like you are anyway?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
Stay alert to how you smell. If
you are dead it will become ap-
parent.

What do you do if you begin to
suspect you aren't dead but smell
like you are anyway?

Take a shower.

What do you do if you go to take a shower, but the water is all brown?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mentat
What do you do if you go to take a shower, but the water is all brown?

Look on the bright side: your
coffee will come out much richer,
and that pesky iron deficiency
will clear up.

What do you do if your pesky iron
deficiency turns out to be an
element 117 deficiency?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by zoobyshoe
What do you do if your pesky iron deficiency turns out to be an element 117 deficiency?

Eat some neutrons so you can fission it back down to iron!

What do you if you have to eat many neutrons, to be able to fission you element 117 meal down to (stable) iron, and you don't yet know just how many it is going to take?

 

[selfAdjoint]

What do you if you have to eat many neutrons, to be able to fission you element 117 meal down to (stable) iron, and you don't yet know just how many it is going to take?

Just give it all up and go fission.

What do you do if you overshoot iron and wind up at element 12?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Quit your job as a welder imme-
diately.What do you do if a small boy with
a fourth of July sparkler starts
to chase you down the street?

 

[Sonty]

Press and hold the Shift button, jump, turn arround in the air, pull out your 9mm and waste the little bugger... Oh, wait I finished that game...

What do you do if you have a gaming addiction?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Sonty
What do you do if you have a gaming addiction?

I bet you you don't.

What do you do if it feels like
its getting pretty close to
absolute zero outside but you
don't know how to read Kelvin
thermometer?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What do you do if it feels like
its getting pretty close to
absolute zero outside but you
don't know how to read Kelvin
thermometer?

Place a call into Mr. Rankin, he'll tell you the temps D'air.

What do you do if you can't really think up a question, so you writes up yourselves a little blub that is humorous, but in doing that yuz discovers a question that emerges like that critter in the movie alien (but from you brain) not realizing that the question that you have asked is sooooooo difficult to respond to that in the entirety of all of the time that might remain, prior to someone actually taking the same amount of time to think up an "most excellant Answer" the question lines drops out of existence, but really because the question is like this one, too difficult to figure out an answer?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Go down to skid row, find the most
hallucinated, delusional drunk you
can, and ask him for suggestions.

What do you do if the proof of
Fermat's theorem comes to you in
a dream but you can't remember it
when you wake up?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What do you do if the proof of Fermat's theorem comes to you in
a dream but you can't remember it when you wake up?

Go down to skid row, find the most hallucinated, delusional drunk you
can, and ask him to remember it for you!

What do you do if you think you have an answer (or two) to Fermat's last theorem, only to find out it actually isn't??

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if you think you have an answer (or two) to Fermat's last theorem, only to find out it actually
isn't??

Go down to skid row and join the club. This is what drove them all
to drink.

What do you do if you wake up one
morning with binocular vision?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
Go down to skid row and join the club. This is what drove them all
to drink.

What do you do if you wake up one
morning with binocular vision?

Rejoice that nothing has changed.

What do you if wake up one morning without binocular vision?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mentat
What do you if wake up one morning without binocular vision?

By a parrot and go to sea.

What do you do if you meant to
say telescopic vision but said
binocular instead?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
By a parrot and go to sea.

What do you do if you meant to
say telescopic vision but said
binocular instead?

You post the question as your next "what do you do".

What do you do if you wake up with telescopic vision? (sorry, couldn't help it.)

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by Mentat
What do you do if you wake up with telescopic vision?

Bi a pair/2 of binoculars, so you can see in Binocular vision!

What do you do if you cannot afford the binocluars offered on e-bay?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if you cannot afford the binocluars offered on e-bay?

Duct tape and old telescopes.

What do you do if you wake up
one morning with eyes on the back
of your head?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What do you do if you wake up
one morning with eyes on the back
of your head?

Look Aroooound!

What do you do if you find yourself, lost, inside your own head?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if you find yourself, lost, inside your own head?

There's one of those "you are
here" kiosks on every sulcus
of the brain. Piece o' cake.

What do you do if you wake up in
the morning, look in the mirror
and see that you bear a certain
resemblance to the face on mars?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by zoobyshoe
What do you do if you wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and see that you bear a certain resemblance to the face on mars?

Definetly "M-O-I-S-T-U-R-I-Z-E" then, go back to sleep!

What do you do if, when you have fallen asleep, with your moisturizer on, you awake to find that you now have the collapsed waveforms of several goldfish, swimming on your facial expression, busily chasing, and eating, grey babies?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What do you do if, when you have fallen asleep, with your moisturizer on, you awake to find that you now have the collapsed waveforms of several goldfish, swimming on your facial expression, busily chasing, and eating, grey babies?

I wouldn't worry about it too
much. These things happen.

What do you do if you've been
there, but you haven't
done that?