Horrible Discovery: Uncovering a Fatal Flaw

I wish I could write this anonymously. Please do not look at my name.

I asked you not to look.

Several people on the board mentioned the subservientchicken website. Curious, I went to it, and have been pretty depressed since.

I would like to know if anyone else has had this experience of finding out something wretched about oneself, something shocking, something that acted as the trigger to finding out you're not what you thought you were.

I was asking the chicken to do various tasks, such as "read a book," "stand on couch," and so forth. It was so cute!

Then, I said "I love you, Chicken!" to him. He went up close to the screen, and I *thought* he did a "Hook 'em Horns" sign at me. I detest UT, the Longhorns...why I thought the chicken knew this, I have no idea now.

This is where I found out that instead of being practical-minded, I am cynical-minded, and can never trust myself again. I've never been one to do anything mean. Lots of people evidently have urges to do mean things, like step on a cat's tail, kill a ladybug, say something cruel. But I've felt very, very lucky I never wished to do mean things.

This is the horrible part: I FOR SOME HORRIBLE REASON TOLD THE CHICKEN TO "DIE."

And he did.

HE HAD NOT DONE THE "HOOK 'EM" SIGN, HE HAD DONE THE ***I LOVE YOU*** SIGN LANGUAGE SIGN. Too late, I realized this.

Well, I urge you to stay off of that site. I am really rethinking what kind of person I am. And thanks for listening. I'm sad I turned out to be a bad person, an untrustworthy person. Has anyone ever been able to come back from finding out a fatal flaw? I really don't trust my heart now. I have been crying for hours and I have to go on shift in a few minutes. I wonder what horrible other things are lurking just beneath my supposedly nice surface.

Has anyone ever been able to come back from finding out a fatal flaw? I really don't trust my heart now.

What fatal flaw? If you really must be dedicated to becoming a horrid, terrible, disgusting, twerp, you have to really plan out these acts before hand. Blue prints, plans, scope out the enemy territory, get an alibi positioned to take the fall for you. Get to know your intended victim's weaknesses and strenghts,,,,,,

Planning an intent to destroy and or insult. That is the flaw in your trip into self-hate. Without planning, I think you'll only find yourself being normal and having normal boo-boo's.

Perfection can be achieved in the next dimension. Not here.

Just my personal opinion, if you're really intent on becoming a monster forever more, you really seem to suck at it.

Maybe you should blame UT for making their "hook 'em horns" sign so closely resemble the "I love you" sign.

- Warren

holly said:

This is the horrible part: I FOR SOME HORRIBLE REASON TOLD THE CHICKEN TO "DIE."

Sounds like somebody just had their first taste of bloodlust!

You can always tell the chicken to come back to life.

I think the chicken comes back to life on his own a few seconds later. He was just pretending, holly!

- Warren

i wonder what happens if you ask him "what came first?"

Short shift tonight.

Of course, I rushed right to the computer to see if anyone had had a similar experience and regained their better selves after...

My husband has forbidden me to mention the chicken (or Martian cats, for that matter).

Sorry, I am under a strain...the nursing home is just so stressful, so many "screamers" are in residence there, it's nervewracking, and a terribly sad, sad place, and to top it off, I saw a dead prairie dog and a dead ground squirrel BOTH in one day.

Very sorry to be sniveling about the chicken, that's right, he didn't really die...

holly said:

I would like to know if anyone else has had this experience of finding out something wretched about oneself, something shocking, something that acted as the trigger to finding out you're not what you thought you were.

Sure, I have always taken pride in my courage. Just a few days ago I discovered on the forum much to my abhorrence and horror that I am actually a cringing coward, a pathetic little worm when it comes to blunt criticism. And I was red and shaking. The discovery did not feel good, but it would be the starting point of self perfection. Don't be too hard on yourself. I would remember the lesson (hard not to) and work at whatever it taught me. By the way, I think you are a fine person with a good heart and plenty of introzpection . Nice to meet you.

It's all good, holly, except for one little thing...

How in the world do you find that thing to be cute?

cookiemonster

Gracious, Polly, you have yourself by the throat practically. I don't know what happened on the forum, but if you were the recipient of malicious criticism, don't blame yourself! Calling yourself a worm and a cringing coward is just not warranted! Gosh, I'm glad I missed that thread; it sounds like it was quite negative.

Yeah, the "post here and be spited" thread didnt last long...

chroot said:

Maybe you should blame UT for making their "hook 'em horns" sign so closely resemble the "I love you" sign.

- Warren

The "hook-em-horns" is actually the Italian's sign of affection for "Up Yours". A quick twist of the wrist is added for greater impact.

Oh no sweat. Sometimes we need to be broken down to be moulded again. It is very kind of you Holly and Jimmy.